Winter Adventure Pups
April 29, 2025
Magpie & the Road
May 1, 2025Imagine what the feathered version of you would be. We have some suggestions.
Pygmy Nuthatch
Are you an energetic socialite? The friend who insists on group adventures? Are you (or do you want to be) an acrobat? Do you want a village to help you raise your kids? Pygmy Nuthatches live in flocks and roost together (yay for bird snuggles!). They’re not the best singers — more squeaky than anything else —although their agility on a tree trunk is unparalleled (nuthatches can climb down a tree trunk headfirst). They breed cooperatively, meaning each nest comes with a loyal, busy, and delightfully scrappy crew of helpers (hallelujah).
Magpie
Magpies are in the corvid family with crows and ravens. They are intelligent, highly social birds who play and have exceptional problem-solving abilities. They are also very skilled at teasing dogs and cats, and taunting human neighbors with their hubbub. As a magpie you can enjoy a varied diet of insects, small mammals, eggs, and carrion. Sporting a fabulous bird tuxedo with feathers that catch the light in brilliant blues, as if dipped in twilight, you will be the best dressed bird this side of the equator (except for maybe the Galapagos penguins). Plus you’ll always be surrounded by your kith and kin.
Hairy Woodpecker
Don’t worry, the Hairy Woodpecker isn’t actually hairy. They have pretty stunning black and white plumage with a splash of red (on the males). If you’re in the habit of banging your head against walls, figuratively or literally, this bird might be the one for you. As a woodpecker, you get the added bonus of avoiding concussions with your head-banging through special adaptations. You’ll eat insects, nuts, and seeds as you forage among the trees. YOU PREFER ALONE TIME, DON’T SOCIALIZE MUCH, AND LIKE JOEY... YOU DON’T. SHARE. FOOD (OR TERRITORY).
Turkey
If you’re not one for heights, you may want to be a turkey. Although they can fly, they don’t soar, and prefer to spend most of their time hoofing it from place to place during the day and sleeping in trees at night. As a turkey you get to be a true omnivore, eating nuts, berries, insects, and snails. Turkeys are social, large birds with gorgeous mating displays. You also get to “gobble gobble” gloriously and often, and cause traffic jams just for fun, strutting across the road at whatever pace you choose. Honks mean nothing to you.
Meadowlark
With a guidebook description of “chunky, shortailed, and a round-shouldered posture,” these birds might not sound impressive at first. But just wait until they open their mouths to sing — with highly melodic songs, these birds are the definition of musical beauty.
Add to that their yellow breast with distinctive black “V,” and you have irresistibly loveable birds. Do you love singing in the shower, harbor daydreams of headlining the opera, or even enjoy simply hanging on the porch (or fence post) making song-filled connections with friends? Meadowlark might be the fit for you.
Great-horned owl
A lethal hunting carnivore who prefers to operate at night. They aren’t well-liked by most other birds, but that’s kind of fair since Great-horned owls like to snack on them. As a Great-horned owl you will be able to fly silently and maneuver expertly between trees in the forest, while sporting really excellent feather tufts on your head like horns. These owls are the largest owls in North America. They have great eyesight but their sense of smell is next-to-nonexistent, which is why they don’t mind eating skunks. For those of you with less-than-refined palates, this might be the bird for you.
Illustration by Jenae Neeson
